was about to start on a fantabulous and i mean FANTABULOUS BLOG ENTRY ABOUT always wanting to try out the new SHOKODU and having finally tried, SHOPPING SPREE today that amounted to a few hundred, rocking marche rostis and crepes, meetups, pranks we played and RANDOM funny events that has injected my life with THIS much (OF COS U CANT ESTIMATE) joyyyy throughout the otherwise mugger week. and YES i should feel guilty enjoying amidst my exams (another paper down today). AND RIGHT NOW I SHOULD BE AT ERIC'S BIRTHDAY POOLSIDE PARTY! BUT!
ZZ!

this really really really, and i mean all the reallys in the world, trivial thing happened. and it made me realise why WE, yes- you and me CANNOT have a normal relationship. Of course there are so many other "pairs of us" that experience difficulties through the course of theirs but the sparks of friction that flew tonight (SUCHA DRAMA QUEEN!) just proves a dead-end here.



I feel like BLASTING IN YOUR FACE.
I TRIED, OKAY?
I TRIED to make it work.
To make us work.
ALL these years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fucking years wasted throughout my teens, not that i'm very young anymore and THATS PRECISELY WHY IT MATTERS.
ALL these years of SHOULD-HAVE-BEEN HAPPINESS!!



And all this while I've been blaming myself, turning poor me into the worry anxious tart i now am.
But for once, tonight, I decided to take a step back.
And I looked.
And I saw through you.
The words you say.
They slice.
And for once I thought to myself, maybe just maybe, the problem doesn't lie with me.
RELEASE YOURSELF!
I can't explain how much you affect me.
I wish you didn't the way you did and still do.
I can't explain how upset I am that our relationship isn't normal.
Enough of trying on my side, enough of trying to break down your wall.
If you don't fancy my company, I wouldn't want to and will not bother to stay even a second longer.
Stone cold heart.
I'm done here.
And to all the kpo-s out there I'm not talking about Jo! (yes it has come to my attn that certain pple that i previously didnt know of has started patronizing this blog -_-; whatever little satisfaction you derive out of it)

stop spying on my life la!
yes realllll bitchy mood now.
click x.
bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






I've been hiding in this bed for weeks from this
Throats raw from screaming and I haven't said a word
The sky is calling, and the stars, they point to this
To a chair we see your breath in the air (breath in the air)
but only for a little while

Your cold pale skin and tainted purple lips
Let me embrace you with this kiss
And together we'll float like angels
Together... together we will float like angels

Higher than the heavens the clouds part ways
"Promise me to never look down!",
and we'll stay like this forever
If your stomach feels weak,
then my work here is done
To hide from our twisted ways,
I've been hiding in this bed
Been hiding in this bed for weeks