Wednesday, April 30, 2008 Y 8:35 PM
msn me or something if you want the link! :)
Saturday, April 26, 2008 Y 9:06 PM
was about to start on a fantabulous and i mean FANTABULOUS BLOG ENTRY ABOUT always wanting to try out the new SHOKODU and having finally tried, SHOPPING SPREE today that amounted to a few hundred, rocking marche rostis and crepes, meetups, pranks we played and RANDOM funny events that has injected my life with THIS much (OF COS U CANT ESTIMATE) joyyyy throughout the otherwise mugger week. and YES i should feel guilty enjoying amidst my exams (another paper down today). AND RIGHT NOW I SHOULD BE AT ERIC'S BIRTHDAY POOLSIDE PARTY! BUT!
this really really really, and i mean all the reallys in the world, trivial thing happened. and it made me realise why WE, yes- you and me CANNOT have a normal relationship. Of course there are so many other "pairs of us" that experience difficulties through the course of theirs but the sparks of friction that flew tonight (SUCHA DRAMA QUEEN!) just proves a dead-end here.
I feel like BLASTING IN YOUR FACE.
I TRIED, OKAY?
I TRIED to make it work.
To make us work.
ALL these years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fucking years wasted throughout my teens, not that i'm very young anymore and THATS PRECISELY WHY IT MATTERS.
ALL these years of SHOULD-HAVE-BEEN HAPPINESS!!
And all this while I've been blaming myself, turning poor me into the worry anxious tart i now am.
But for once, tonight, I decided to take a step back.
And I looked.
And I saw through you.
The words you say.
And for once I thought to myself, maybe just maybe, the problem doesn't lie with me.
I can't explain how much you affect me.
I wish you didn't the way you did and still do.
I can't explain how upset I am that our relationship isn't normal.
Enough of trying on my side, enough of trying to break down your wall.
If you don't fancy my company, I wouldn't want to and will not bother to stay even a second longer.
Stone cold heart.
I'm done here.
And to all the kpo-s out there I'm not talking about Jo! (yes it has come to my attn that certain pple that i previously didnt know of has started patronizing this blog -_-; whatever little satisfaction you derive out of it)
stop spying on my life la!
yes realllll bitchy mood now.
I've been hiding in this bed for weeks from this
Throats raw from screaming and I haven't said a word
The sky is calling, and the stars, they point to this
To a chair we see your breath in the air (breath in the air)
but only for a little while
Your cold pale skin and tainted purple lips
Let me embrace you with this kiss
And together we'll float like angels
Together... together we will float like angels
Higher than the heavens the clouds part ways
"Promise me to never look down!",
and we'll stay like this forever
If your stomach feels weak,
then my work here is done
To hide from our twisted ways,
I've been hiding in this bed
Been hiding in this bed for weeks
Friday, April 18, 2008 Y 1:10 AM
MICH's 19th BDAE @ billybombers!!!so much catching up and we arrived at the conclusion that different churches and crazy schedules cldnt -and didnt -change anythn between us :) sirloin steak, good ole fishnchips and zee distasteful complimentary drink. shopped arnd for a bit after thattttttt , but not-so-guilty girls afterall! damn good buys at marinasq :))
headed down for planetshakers concert with esther jeremy and 2 others from their church @ expo, with jo. WHAT AN EYEOPENER! refreshing and dynamic!! i love how some of planetshakers' lyrics are so beautiful and manifest so simply yet powerfully the heart and will and love of god; never let him go. my one prayer would be that everyoneeeeee (and by this i really do mean EVERYONE ) gave themselves a chance, to experience him.
went to john little sale at expo! got suede flats! SO worthit!!!!!!!!!
hosted a group of 15 phillipino missionaries at my house , one of the last opportunities before we move out. this boy's zed. he is SO adorable. came up to me on monday morning when all of us were having breakfast and said "You are my crushhh!" .. wheeee! HAHA.. told him i love him too (jo very jealous). don't you think we have the same toothy grin!???
anyhowww, was doing my readings and i am officially convinced, like 101% sure, that I am a perfect synonym for comorbidity. i.e., i suffer from mood, anxiety and all other disorders save for the ones that involve eating . i have these manic periods.. probably bipolar and a bit of schizo. Definitely OCPD. still rmb researching on this topic for sec 2's ipw.. and i recall feeding Sulastri , my teamate, pork beehoon (absent-mindedly)! saw her the other day at kr term haha.. talked to sp online recently 2.. now we can look back and laugh on the things that happened in sec2! anw before i digress, psych's pretty interesting, would have majored in it after econs.
getting germ vocab and finals results tmr. and that'll be the end of Deutsch for this sem. i dont know, if all goes well i'll probably move on to german 3 next sem.. but as for now..BAH. Wir mochte nicht Deutsch studieren und am letzten Wochenende habe ich fur Deutsch Prufung gestudiert und dann schlecht gegangen. If it makes any sense at all.
jogged last night at West Coast! WOW. i can't tell you how much my thigh muscles ached after that, inspite of the slow speed i was trudging along at.. so slow that cw and i managed to talk in between breaths throughout. it's been a long time since i exercised.. some attempt to keep fit! haha! btw was pretty mad at some incident!!!! hall fined me for like, screaming and "making excessive noise" past 11pm. the evil roomie, oli and i were digging for my lost transponder (key) in the rubbish bin at about 3 one morning. i shalln't start on how i thought it got there. damn happy when i found it so i screamed like mad la but urghhhh the next moment? the cost of making a new transponder = $42 but the fine was $50.. :(:(:(:( might as well dont find it la...
Smileysources of the week:
-ECF's successful choc fondue party at night !
-successful room bidding for next sem!
-gr8response for the internship even got pple from SIM and NTU responding!
-jo's calls (the ones i COERCED him to make every morning since the start of the week HAHA)
you are such a joy to hear, to love, to-allthingsbrightandbeautiful with!!! :)
-WHAT THE PUCK! officially the fun-nest dota round of the week.
i l o v e y o u !
it's getting lateeeeeee. sleeptight!
Saturday, April 5, 2008 Y 10:13 AM
LOVE :) they're so pretty and classic.
Friday, April 4, 2008 Y 11:11 PM
I GOT NEW BOOTS !!!! *SQUEALS* all the way from japan :D with love from aunt layling! and mom got SO MANY LOVELY SWEEETS AND WHATNOTS!!!! pretty handmade kimono creations! upload pics sooon!!!!
Wednesday, April 2, 2008 Y 3:46 AM
pretty much decided on the layout of my room esp after trip to ikea on sat! when it came to drawing the line between practicality and my fetish for summery colours (yes,pink being a subset) .. had to make extraaaaaspecialllll effort. had our usual of swedish meatballs and fried wings!! insatiable :) seriously? jam with meatballs? innovation! :) got new black shorts.. very nice material.. softsatin almost. sponsored by dad.
haircut @ dylan's . been a while. he's setting up his own salon near amk central. i guess change is the only constant thing eh? and fyi, my hair has been in the same grassy stage for at least 3 months.. so the haircut was timely and much needed. refreshing! btw sunsilk soft and silky is really goooood. like, i feel the effects of my bleached hair softening. and asience conditioner/avene moisturiser is highly recommended too. :D
headed down to church for bible study thereafter. topic of discussion was laziness, something that i too often fall prey to. blame it on the fall of man/human nature. you/i-know-it. sometimes i cant help but give 'reasons' knowing that they are, in essence, excuses. anw dinner was at ttsh kopitiam. yongtaufoo makes one of my fav chi food! love the straw mushrooms and seaweed. i think it's the only time i eat healthily. haha freaking rocks. visited eelin and her new born amelia at TMH .. i'm sure she's gonna blossom into a pretty some day. I can already tell! nice lashes . told jo i wanna deliver at Gleneagles in the future. against all odds. mom and daughter ought to share the same birth place haha! plus it's a private hospital and somehow in safer-hands.
(p/s im in the last picture.. but it came out as her imaginary fren..)
Thurs spelt fun fun fun. walked around in central mall after last min tuition (urgh) and got my necessary eyeliner deal in like, ten mins? damn worthit. jap o+ brand buy one get one free! and it's two sided. so it's like four colours in total.. the blue's a nice striking shade. headed down to MOS for nus' voices bash. supported; zhifei on the bass. woah. this guy named roger's damn stunning, esp his rendition of jay's heiseyoumo.. first time i heard it was on zhen's mp3. and he played live keyboards too.. wowed! love the kimono number too. haha met denise there! john's friend.. damn coincidental! couldnt recognise her.. been 2 years? anyway all 6 of us, yes strangers included, went up for the games and won 6 pairs of Gv tix/ shiseido stuff and some goodies including now defunk lolitapop$50 vouchers. haha . got free lessons at a music sch too. all in the name of fun la ;)
slept till late on monday and woke up to an empty house. realised how much i'm gonna miss it , and even more so, the memories. can't recall how many times i've walked myself down memory lane, through the hallway and rooms.. some memories seemingly more vivid than others. had buffet and swirl :D
my spree item is officially on this island! yay!!!! though not officially in my hands yet , but still :D soon soon. i told him i was going through depression and he was like .. you're just in need of retail therapy, haha. true true true became an esprit member on sunday after dance. yay the first stanza's done haha! damn happy with my purchases too! i think i haven't splurged in a long while. plus tuition earns me a few hundred this month.. so not too bad :) we cooked lunch for dad and wen since mom's holidaying in japan with her frens. oooh nice cherry blossoms :) anyway our absolutely sumptuous dinner comprised of ngoh hiang, tomato prawns, omelette and guotie. it turned out so much better than i had expected us to do.. he peeled the prawns, of course.
ss proj submitted! haha we didnt do much, really. finally went for psych lecture on mon night ( schizo's a really interesting topic. search youtube for gerald/schizo damn sad! ) .. had dinner with them and studied with buddy jared till bk lights out.. headed back to hall.. we sleptsuper early at 4am -_- dragged myself out of bed this morning due to raunchy adventures lastnight,not! haha. met up with kaiwei at ten ! yay after so long!
bk breakfast .. it's her virgin hashbrown experience. Exhilerating la! haha finally studied like ONE chapter of micro econs. cue: applause. HAPPY APRIL FOOLS EVERYONE.. haha cant begin to count how many pple the eveilroomie and i have conned. but everyone gets a taste of their own medicine. Congwei messagd me and said free arts lunch for all wearing yellow top yellow shoes and yellow shorts. almost got connnnnnnnned. i was decked out in like 2/3 yellow?
Headed down to LT9 for Econometrics Lecture.. yesss.. my third in the whole sem. It's seriously by god's grace how the evil roomie and i did pretty darn well for our mid term stats paper. actually listend for the first hour.. but started to smell edna's fruity pens in the second.. haha. we got lost somewhere... SSE i think. err..chatterboxed.decided to leave at five mins to the end of lect. haha. got myself a waffle.. and then tuition AGAIN. had sheare's for lunch cum dinner cum supper. walked all the way there and back .. thank god shangxin came to dapao too. all these irregular meals has my stomach topsyturvy ( or pancreas, according to the bioguru celeste)
at ps's manhattten's. a quick bite :D btw, vantage point makes a good example of the deitic function of films. watched an empress and her warriors.. i'm still surprised as to how the general managed to survive so many spears.
now i'm just staring at vinna's handwritten convo for our german oral on friday, hoping my brain will somehow work its charm.. pray i'll survive :)
Wednesday, March 26, 2008 Y 2:19 AM
And in case you were wondering, we came as candy girls/ fake oompaloompa (Go Roald Dahl!)! haha Spot willy wonka!
..a ___ meiyi. / Wolverine.
the twins ( nic on the right)
Chris :) / Esther my fav senior. yes.. the crazy horse session HAHA.
camera girl manyan! :D
We spent most on the make up .. trimmed our fake eyelashes etc.. manyan did our hair. weijun has the nicest creamed hair!!!! :D cel and mine turned out floppish haha and surprisingly the heels didnt kill me. seriosly the whole room was in a mess man. shockpink hairspray/accessories/ strewn rubbish/broken necklaces/eyeshimmer/shadow/blusher/foundation/clothes strewn. but its the funn-EST part. haha. went shopping for their clothes one day before! late late dinner treat by shang at cafe cartel.
Had Durian at Geylang after dnd itself! swee and shang drovere. I took shang's car (safer) HAHA. We get this uncomfortable feeling walking the streets there though..especially at sucha late hour. (Since our dnd at M Hotel was delayed by 3 hours?everyone turned up fashionably late as usual). ANw, at geylang it was the firstime I pointed vulgar at someone in a manner of self defence (or not much of) haha. felt the need to act.
NUS OPENHOUSE WAS A SUCCESS!!!!
check out our busstop design.guided tour #1 stop.
had a hardtime stalling the scholars.. hs and i practically crapped.. haha but it was fun
everything's done now :D
hmm got thru the interviews for ehoc. Monday was also Adam Khoo -cum- Advisors Alliance internship talk. I haven't come up with the posters for advertisement =/ grrr. due this thurs! sheesh.
oooh and i pillion rode for the virginth time in my life. i feel like........ ghost rider. in my denim skirt. so i had to sit on one side. Yes, knowing how i dont like the length of my skirts to be too long. breezy comfy is the way to go.. thighlength is best. it was a short ride anyhow. worth an experience!
on a random note, hope the evil one passes her driving test tmr!
so much cuter when he was young?............................ HAHA now he's like..the goofy one!
i guess togetherness isn't as much a name as it is felt. he's scheduled for surgery on may 9th.
i pray that all goes well
that's all for now! i am going to paint my new room a brilliant candy stripe. OMGZXZXX MY OWN ROOM AFTER soon-to-be 20 years of living.
It's gonna be dayindayoutprincessliving.
keep it simple
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